The difference between teaching and just knowing better

“Stop stop stop! This scene is not working.”

The teacher was right. I am taking a workshop and I got myself into one of those impossible scenes: completely at a loss of what to do or say. But luckily there was the teacher to save us from this monstrosity of a scene.

He got out of his chair in the back of the room, joined us on stage and with his finger pointing to my face he exclaimed: “Just… Don’t THINK!”

After which he retreated back to his throne, leaving me more confused than ever. So lost. I remember nothing of what happened after that, but let me tell you… It was not good.

This bad experience was a few years ago. I shivered when I was recently reminded of it in a session with my coachee. We discussed how sometimes as a teacher you can be right, but that interestingly: that is actually not what teaching is about.

If you ask me, teaching is about letting someone else learn. Sharing what you consider truth does not always lead to learning. Knowing the difference between the two is what makes you an actually effective teacher.

Let me take the situation above… Does present-day Laura think the teacher was right? That my problem at the time was that I was thinking too much?

Yes, totally correct.

In my head.

Overthinking.

Not letting go.

All of it.

However… Is telling an overthinking, heady, control-freaky player that she thinks too much the path to thinking less?

Hell no.

Though it is a correct observation, sharing that observation with me (“You should think less!”) did not help me learn.

As teachers we want to think about: what will help this student learn and how can I offer that? For instance: helping a player relax, feel safe and feel playful when they are overthinking. (Or at least, that would be my dream scenario. Leave your tough love for someone else.)

And in my experience, it doesn’t just go for overthinking.

Want to have more genuine moments of intimacy? Give players plenty time to discuss boundaries.

Want to show more beautiful body movement? Start with ugly dancing.

Want to create a better overarching storyline? Focus on better scenes.

Next time you are teaching, or in a rehearsal, and you notice what is lacking or wrong… Think about whether sharing it, will have the effect that you are aiming for.

If your students are blocking a lot, maybe you don’t sit them down and tell them sternly that “Blocking is bad. Don’t block.” Instead you focus on more fun, positive warmup games to get them in the right mindset before playing scenes.

Because it is not important that you know better. What is actually important is that they learn.

It is not about you. It is about them.